After "Out of the Fog"

I wrote the story "Out of the Fog" thinking that "this" was my tale of survival.  Well, as usual, God had other plans for me.  I really did not remember much of the survival story that I wrote about, other than my life after the crash.  But, after publishing the story in March of 2009, I learned a whole new dimension of "survival"!

Things were really exciting in the spring of 2009.  After the book went to print, there were book signings and press coverage, it was a whirl wind of amazing moments.  I travelled to many small book stores to sign the book and talk about it with others.  One of the first signing events was at the Daffodil festival on Nantucket.  It was an amazing time, seeing old friends and enjoying a beautiful weekend on the island.  Book sales were on fire!  Plum did an interview with me about the book, it began what was to me a whirl wind of a summer.



There were some people that even thanked me for finally putting this story in print.  Soon after, I was approached about the thought of creating a permanent memorial site in honor of the victims.  It was a plan that quickly was put into action and in August of 2009 the 50th anniversary of the event a memorial site was dedicated on Nantucket.

The memorial dedication was a beautiful event and I was able to meet the only other living survivor, and many who were involved in the rescue and related to victims or other survivors.  At one book signing I met the nurse that took care of Lita and others flown to Boston.  At another, I met a woman who only one week before the crash had the stewardess as her maid of honor in her wedding.  Everywhere I went, it seemed as though people were excited to read the book and talk about their memories of this tragedy.  It seemed as though it was closure for many of those that I met.

 

After the memorial dedication I returned home to NH and continued scheduling book signings and enjoying the warm summer weather.  I can remember the day clearly standing in the kitchen with my husband and this funny pain hit me in the chest.  I reached up to rub the area, commenting to my husband on how weird the pain was.  His comment "better go get it checked".  After that day, I spent several days wondering if it was something that I should go see a doctor about.  Finally, after a week or so, I called the doctors office to see what the nurse thought about it and if I should get it checked.  She told me "if you have pain, don't worry - cancer is usually not painful".  But, then said I should come in, as it was time for my yearly mammogram anyway.  I went in to the doctors office soon after labor day.  There was not a "lump", but more of a "thickness" in my left breast.  The nipple had turned inward and I really had no idea what had caused this.  My doctor examined me and told me that I should have both an ultrasound and a mammogram to determine what the thickness was.  He told me that "IF" it was something confirmed by the testing, there may need to be additional surgery. 

When the nurse scheduled the appointments the ultrasound was the first available appointment to be followed by the mammogram the next week.   On 9/14, I went in for the ultrasound.  I can still see the face of the radiologist when he came back into the exam room and asked me "when was your last mammogram"?  I told him just over a year ago.  With a frightening look of concern he flatly said "well you are getting another one tomorrow".  I knew right then and there, things were going in a bad direction.

The next day I returned for the diagnostic mammogram, and it was confirmed.  The radiologist brought me into the film room and showed me what he suspected was an Invasive form of cancer, most likely he said "was lobular".  The films were rated with a BIRADS score of 5, nothing to mess with.